Photo: Clem Onojeghuo

4 Undeniable Facts That Prove You Can Make Your Life Better

Knowing these facts opens limitless possibilities for your life

You want to change. You even know what you need to do. But a voice inside you says:

“Nothing’s ever going to change.”

“I can’t help myself.”

“I know what I need to do, but I never do it.”

“I could never do that.”

The words tackle you and you fall on the ground, hard. You’ve had the wind knocked out of you, and what you want to accomplish seems impossible.

If you remember only one thing from this article, this is it: These terrible, harmful words are fears, not facts.

I can prove to you that these fears are unfounded. I can prove that you already have the fundamental life skills on which all self-improvement is based.

Fact #1: You can change

You say, “Nothing’s ever going to change,” but…

• Have you given up the pureed pears you loved when you were a year old?
• Have you learned to enjoy some food you didn’t like when you first tried it?
• Have you changed from who you were ten years ago?

You may believe that you are stuck where you are right now. But each “yes” proves that you are always changing, sometimes through your own efforts and sometimes because change is a natural part of life.

Fact #2: You can control what you do

You say, “I have no self-control,” but…

• Have you ever stopped your car when the traffic light turned red?
• Have you ever gone to work or school even when you didn’t feel like it?
• Have you ever been polite to someone even when you felt like yelling at them?

You may believe that you’re powerless in the face of your impulses and bad habits. But each “yes” proves that you are able to refuse to do what you feel like doing and do what you know you need to do.

Fact #3: You have the power to choose and then act on those choices

You say, “I always choose the wrong thing,” but…

• Have you ever realized you were about to eat something that wasn’t good for you, and eaten something else instead?
• Have you ever known what was the right thing to do, and then done it?
• Have you ever done something that you didn’t want to, but you did it because it would help another person out?

You may believe that you just can’t make yourself do what you know you need to; that’s because we all remember our failures but not our successes. But each “yes” shows that you can make good choices and take action to make them happen.

Fact #4: You can achieve goals that require time and effort

You say, “I could never do that,” but…

• Have you ever gotten a passing grade at school?
• Have you ever learned to cope with something (or someone) that at first you just couldn’t handle?
• Have you ever been hired for a job?

You may believe that you can’t do things that are hard to do. Sometimes you believe it because you feel tired or overwhelmed or defeated. Sometimes it’s because you’ve listened to the lazy part of you that tells you everything should be easy. But each “yes” proves that you are capable of reaching goals that require time and effort.

You can change your life more than you ever thought possible

In the past, you have seen change happen in your life; stopped your impulse to do certain things; chosen what is good and done it; and applied time and effort to reach the goals you’ve chosen. Because you have done these things before, you can do them again.

You have already done these things, but it may be that until now, you have not consciously realized that doing the same kind of thing multiple times is much more than a series of unrelated events — it is a skill, and you already have it.

Without these skills, no human being can ever make their life better. Without them, they cannot be happy or successful or lead a meaningful life. But you can fight all the fears that you can never have these things, because now you can tell yourself, “It’s true — I already have the skills I need to change my life.”

Dear Reader, Medium’s decision to allow 1 to 50 👏🏽s is crazy. So I think of clapping as a 1-to-5-stars rating, with 10 claps = 1 star.

I clap 10 times — or 20 — for the articles I read. Not clapping at all feels bad.

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